"Eloi, Eloi..." -Mark 15:34
HE HAS RISEN!!! Happy Easter Sunday. So many things cross my mind today as we celebrate the fact that Jesus rose and defeated death, and that very victory caused death to lose its' grip on me.
The first thing that pops into my mind is the verse that is Mark 15:34. "Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?" which translates to "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?" Jesus. On the cross. Alone, betrayed, in pain. Crying out to our God. Can you imagine? Can you imagine knowing that you are on Earth to lead people to the Father, knowing that they would vote to have you hung on a tree? Today in church we talked about how with Jesus we have to expect the unexpected. No one expected Jesus, God's only son, to be crucified. And then, "Nobody expected no body" -Andy Stanley.
Now to my next thought- I am Judas. I betray Jesus. I am the reason He was put on the cross. I do not deserve eternity in Heaven. I do not deserve forgiveness. I. Put. Jesus. On. That. Cross. My sins upon His shoulders. But let's back up. Jesus knew Judas would betray Him. He even mentioned that He knew who would betray Him at His last supper. Jesus knew it was Judas, and Judas ate too. Judas sat at the table with Jesus. Jesus broke bread and drank wine with Judas. Jesus still sat with Judas. Judas still came up and kissed Him the next morning to betray Him. Jesus knew- and Judas ate too. That's who Jesus is. He loves with no boundaries. He has enough to share. He hung on the cross with me in mind knowing that I would fail Him daily. But, my God, He went anyway. Because He loves me. Because He loves you.
"Life is worth the living just because He lives." Amen, right? Jesus rose. Conquered death. Defeated Satan. Death is inevitable thanks to good ole Adam and Eve. We all deserve to be sent straight to hell. But Jesus promises a better life. Jesus promises love and forgiveness. Jesus promises you will never be alone.
I struggle with that one. I look at Jesus and think, "oh but everyone knew Him, and they LOVED Him. He has no clue how it feels to be alone..." WRONG. So wrong. They hung Him on a tree after stripping Him. They put my beaten Savior on the cross, gave Him the bitter sponge, and told Him to save Himself. He was betrayed by one of His closest friends. He called out to His father in pain. He was alone!!! Jesus was alone. He knows the feeling of betrayal, loneliness, and pain beyond what I could ever imagine. While one was betraying Him, another was denying Him. His mother stood by hopeless. Jesus. Oh, my Jesus.
My head always seems to spin on this day and I wind up in tears. Our Savior crucified- His gain my reward. I do not deserve this love. I do not deserve this grace. I am Judas- and Jesus makes sure I eat too.
If you are lost in your faith, you are not alone. If you are stronger than Samson in your faith, you are not alone. If you don't even know what faith is, you are not alone. Jesus promises to never leave you, because He knows the pain of it all too well. Jesus shed His own blood so that we may change our address from Earth to Zion. "He paid a debt He did not owe, and I owe a debt I cannot pay."
There is hope. There is forgiveness. There is Heaven. Thank you, Jesus. He is risen!!! Hallelujah!!!!!
Keep on keeping on,
Claire Jones
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